So with the prospect of graduating and getting jobs, the state likeliest to hire us is on a very dramatic downward spiral. Its painful, and yet, I still dislike said state, and see its lifestyle as the very poison polluting the economy.
Thats right, California, I blame you. And yet someday I have to live there... Its a very bittersweet prospect, and I kinda hope that this crisis will move big companies to safer states and thus end my possible venture to that state.
For said crisis info check out NPR's website here. Can you imagine the very idea of Washington bailing out a state? It makes me shudder...
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Epiphany
Tell tale signs of my writing passion are returning. The second thoughts and third thoughts about the second thoughts. It is returning. And with it an epiphany. What is really dampening the creative flow for me? Am I being spread to thin? Am I channeling my creativity in too many directions?
And it hit me. Facebook, msn and other social networking. The constant being connected is taking its toll. Last semester I read an critical theory article on the topic, and feeling I had no time I skimmed through. By skimming I missed an important point, I was not taking it all in, rather I had already decided with how busy I am this article was no different and deserved no more attention.
But the truth? With all this time I have there are one of three new options, walking, timekillers such as Facebook and other social networking or watching a show. The isolation of walking is allowing me to rejuvenate what talent for writing I had. And watching TV pacifies me for a time and does not allow me to delve into my own thoughts. Rather it forces upon me new thoughts that are not quite my own. The social networking purges all my thoughts as I am constantly sharing them and forgetting ideas as they are fleeting the screen before my eyes.
Its ironic really, this constant interconnectedness, and all the conflicting theories; one telling us that we aren't social enough and another telling us we are never quite by ourselves. Either extreme seems to leave an unbalanced lifestyle.
I think its silly when I am chastened for not telling someone about an item. Its funny that people expect always to be connected. Well how can someone be happy? My solution, walking.
And so to a happy walking filled isolation, here's to you and hopefully a renewal of the writer I once was.
And it hit me. Facebook, msn and other social networking. The constant being connected is taking its toll. Last semester I read an critical theory article on the topic, and feeling I had no time I skimmed through. By skimming I missed an important point, I was not taking it all in, rather I had already decided with how busy I am this article was no different and deserved no more attention.
But the truth? With all this time I have there are one of three new options, walking, timekillers such as Facebook and other social networking or watching a show. The isolation of walking is allowing me to rejuvenate what talent for writing I had. And watching TV pacifies me for a time and does not allow me to delve into my own thoughts. Rather it forces upon me new thoughts that are not quite my own. The social networking purges all my thoughts as I am constantly sharing them and forgetting ideas as they are fleeting the screen before my eyes.
Its ironic really, this constant interconnectedness, and all the conflicting theories; one telling us that we aren't social enough and another telling us we are never quite by ourselves. Either extreme seems to leave an unbalanced lifestyle.
I think its silly when I am chastened for not telling someone about an item. Its funny that people expect always to be connected. Well how can someone be happy? My solution, walking.
And so to a happy walking filled isolation, here's to you and hopefully a renewal of the writer I once was.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Musings on Star Trek
Girl 1: Look at all those people waiting to see Star Trek
Girl 2: Yeah thats so lame. Star Trek sucks.
Said as they walked back into the Star Trek Movie...
Talk about hypocritical!
So my point? Well what is this new movie going to do for Trekkies, and the answer is nothing. It was just as great as the others with much better graphics and better film quality. The only change is new people might be converted and thats always a good thing.
Case in point, Serenity, more people including myself watched the Firefly TV series after seeing the movie. It was a cultist boon for sci fi lovers and in select cities there is a Browncoat day, where every year they show Serenity.
So for people who call it cheesy, hokey and corny, isn't that the majority of TV in general just dressed up as pop culture? Probably with worse screenwriting and yet that's better because its whats accepted by the majority, No thanks, I'd rather have philosophical questions asked with disconcerting answers.
Anyway for all those who see it, I hope you enjoy it.
So it was very much so Trekkie style just amped up with special affects and better filming that wasn't available in the 60's. Its just not the degradation. It was awesome because J. J. Abrams has worked with it, and perhaps now a new cultist group of fans can potentially happen.
I just think people who have criticized Star Trek won't really able to criticize the new movie like they have the past ones. It was trekky goodness through and through, I just don't think people who aren't trekkies will be bugged or recognize that.be able to criticize the new movie like they have the past ones.
It was trekky goodness through and through, I just don’t think people who aren’t trekkies will be bugged or recognize that.
Girl 2: Yeah thats so lame. Star Trek sucks.
Said as they walked back into the Star Trek Movie...
Talk about hypocritical!
So my point? Well what is this new movie going to do for Trekkies, and the answer is nothing. It was just as great as the others with much better graphics and better film quality. The only change is new people might be converted and thats always a good thing.
Case in point, Serenity, more people including myself watched the Firefly TV series after seeing the movie. It was a cultist boon for sci fi lovers and in select cities there is a Browncoat day, where every year they show Serenity.
So for people who call it cheesy, hokey and corny, isn't that the majority of TV in general just dressed up as pop culture? Probably with worse screenwriting and yet that's better because its whats accepted by the majority, No thanks, I'd rather have philosophical questions asked with disconcerting answers.
Anyway for all those who see it, I hope you enjoy it.
So it was very much so Trekkie style just amped up with special affects and better filming that wasn't available in the 60's. Its just not the degradation. It was awesome because J. J. Abrams has worked with it, and perhaps now a new cultist group of fans can potentially happen.
I just think people who have criticized Star Trek won't really able to criticize the new movie like they have the past ones. It was trekky goodness through and through, I just don't think people who aren't trekkies will be bugged or recognize that.be able to criticize the new movie like they have the past ones.
It was trekky goodness through and through, I just don’t think people who aren’t trekkies will be bugged or recognize that.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Epiphany and Nostalgia
Sitting at my desk working and something hit. Something was off and things were different from how they were a moment ago. There was a whir and a click as I remembered such changes from my childhood. “But I am inside, there’s no way that I could sense something like that in a building. I looked out the window and saw a rainy evening, but something tasted different. Something was letting me get so close to figuring out this mystery of what it was, only to take it away a moment later. And then finally it hit me. The atmosphere was electric with change. Perhaps just maybe Winter has had its last laugh, tormenting us with a white winter wonderland on April Fool’s day. Today is the first real day of spring.
Spring, a world electric with rebirth and second winds, a world where maybe just maybe, I will survive this semester unscathed. With a new charge and ambition lit within me perhaps Spring will bring more renewal, and new beginnings that we all can use.
Spring, a world electric with rebirth and second winds, a world where maybe just maybe, I will survive this semester unscathed. With a new charge and ambition lit within me perhaps Spring will bring more renewal, and new beginnings that we all can use.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Chain Restaurants, Miniature Golf, Bowling, No Thank You
I am not a fan of the above activities, and I make no apologies to all those who enjoy them, this is just my opinion and how I feel.
There are over 100 more appealing things I would choose to do before I resorted to the above activities. They just aren’t fun for me and while I am happy for those who enjoy them, I am tired of people being so surprised that I have such disdain for them.
There are over 100 more appealing things I would choose to do before I resorted to the above activities. They just aren’t fun for me and while I am happy for those who enjoy them, I am tired of people being so surprised that I have such disdain for them.
March's List of Things That Must Go:
My list of things that must go:
- Fake people
- Social Niceties
- Chain Restaurants-I just think people should realize that each and every single time they eat at a chain that 66% of that money leaves the local community. Yes YOU are the reason why people are losing their jobs and the economy is so bad. You aren’t investing in the community you live in, stay in you suburb and stop complaining if you can’t change your oh so important life in the fast lane lifestyle.
- Bowling-shoes that are ugly, throwing a ball down a lane to hit pins and a loud atmosphere that is jarring at best. No thank you
- Tess of the D’Urbervilles, and every person in the world whose personality resembles anyone in the book
- Miniature Golf-if you are going to golf it might be real sized…. While we are at would you like a mini or teacup sized animal that lives an uncomfortable life being cute for your selfish desires
- Reality TV- the name is a conundrum, its not real. Its really stupid but that’s as close to reality as it gets. If I chose to be pacified from all of lifes troubles it might as well be unbelievably well written dialogue, and I can concede to it not being real.
- People over reacting because something in life will no longer pander to their every want and need.
- People who walk away from their mortgage
- People who won’t live within their means
- People who don’t recycle
- High speed internet that doesn’t work-makes listening to online lectures next to impossible
- 80 dollar headphones. That’s right Zagg, I think you are an idiot if you think people will spend that much on headphones when they won’t spend money on anything else.
- ProvoCraft I hate them, first of all their very name includes my 2nd most hated place in the world, the first being Disneyland, world etc… 2nd they have without a doubt the absolute worst customer service I have ever encountered!
- Ingratitude-Sure I like being nice and sharing, but if you accept it ungraciously and take advantage of the situation I have no choice but to feel misused and left cynical.
On the Verge of Ranting
My brain is on the verge of exploding, it is so exhausted and has so much to say but it can’t. Nothing is coherently flowing, just a garbled mess of thoughts connecting from one issue to the next in a very obscure way. I’m just tired, but feel like putting together a list of both, my frustrations, happiness and the meh gray area.
This blog has been utterly unused the last little while, not that that means I’ve calmed down, hardly, it just means I’m using the passion to fire other projects.
So much so that now, when I want to have my thoughts placed in front of me, I can barely grasp what fired me up in the first place. I have been busy and I seem to still not be able to say no and continue to put to much on my plate.
Work has kept me busy, school has kept me busy, and I count every single one of my lucky stars and blessings that I am busy in both fields.
In one of my classes I’ve been reading Tess of the D’Urbervilles which is how Twilight in a real world, with better writing, would have turned out. It’s a trajedy, a very well written trajedy and only makes me more frustrated because it does take place in a time when Feminism didn’t exist. The Victorian era is an absolute conundrum to me, and I can’t believe a people could be so hoity toity. So as I continue to read this book I voice my problems and issues to Ryan while he calms me down by letting me know what really is backwards thinking and what isn’t.
For example a guy does something and expects the girl to forgive him but she has no control and something is done to her that she can’t help and he won’t forgive her. I’d like to skewer anyone who can think that this is ok and I get even angrier when this fault is why he falls in love with her in the first place.
It’s a book that makes me hate men, and women who put up with abuse and mistreatment. Not only that, but its put a fire in my belly that I haven’t been able to stop, I’m just angry this week and I do blame the book.
The professor hates the heroine and says that once people can come to terms with hating her, the book becomes much more likeable. So I very very much so hate the book, the main character, the hypocritical men and all other aspects of the book. If the book does end happily I will throw a fit. In short, I don’t think any of the men, or women in the book deserve to be happy. And if I ever encounter someone who reminds me of these characters with their many shortcomings I believe I will hate the person.
Which brings me to my next point, I’m so tired of receiving notice at big gatherings where people say they miss me so much and wish we got together more, and its because I feel, that’s right feel so you can’t disagree with my feeling, that they then put all responsibility of not seeing me on me. I can’t and won’t subscribe to that way of thinking and think its highly idiotic to tell a person that you wish you saw them more, if you don’t call, text, or e-mail them. But it gets better, if they said that once every 6 months or so I could careless but it happens EVERY time I see them, which is much more than once every 6 months.
Also, I am sick of people double booking their evenings and jumping from one event to the next. Why can’t you just pick one and genuinely enjoy being there? Perhaps we are just in very different places in life, which is ok, but I’d rather be cancelled on than have a pity visit.
I guess what it comes down to is I’m still sick of people being fake and social niceties.
Then I hate arriving somewhere and people waiting till just after I get there to take off, I’d rather be told not to go and not waste my time which is incredibly valuable to me.
I’m dizzy from this week and it doesn’t even feel like next week is spring break, I’m tired and maybe a week free from classes (but not homework) will improve my mood, but I am so tired of so called friends doing all of the above and in every sense of the word acting like the dumb characters from the book aforementioned.
Can’t I just be who I am instead of playing the social niceties game? Perhaps this is just Ryan rubbing off on me, but what a more exhilarating way to live, where I am who I am in all circles of life. This vent has been a long time coming.
This blog has been utterly unused the last little while, not that that means I’ve calmed down, hardly, it just means I’m using the passion to fire other projects.
So much so that now, when I want to have my thoughts placed in front of me, I can barely grasp what fired me up in the first place. I have been busy and I seem to still not be able to say no and continue to put to much on my plate.
Work has kept me busy, school has kept me busy, and I count every single one of my lucky stars and blessings that I am busy in both fields.
In one of my classes I’ve been reading Tess of the D’Urbervilles which is how Twilight in a real world, with better writing, would have turned out. It’s a trajedy, a very well written trajedy and only makes me more frustrated because it does take place in a time when Feminism didn’t exist. The Victorian era is an absolute conundrum to me, and I can’t believe a people could be so hoity toity. So as I continue to read this book I voice my problems and issues to Ryan while he calms me down by letting me know what really is backwards thinking and what isn’t.
For example a guy does something and expects the girl to forgive him but she has no control and something is done to her that she can’t help and he won’t forgive her. I’d like to skewer anyone who can think that this is ok and I get even angrier when this fault is why he falls in love with her in the first place.
It’s a book that makes me hate men, and women who put up with abuse and mistreatment. Not only that, but its put a fire in my belly that I haven’t been able to stop, I’m just angry this week and I do blame the book.
The professor hates the heroine and says that once people can come to terms with hating her, the book becomes much more likeable. So I very very much so hate the book, the main character, the hypocritical men and all other aspects of the book. If the book does end happily I will throw a fit. In short, I don’t think any of the men, or women in the book deserve to be happy. And if I ever encounter someone who reminds me of these characters with their many shortcomings I believe I will hate the person.
Which brings me to my next point, I’m so tired of receiving notice at big gatherings where people say they miss me so much and wish we got together more, and its because I feel, that’s right feel so you can’t disagree with my feeling, that they then put all responsibility of not seeing me on me. I can’t and won’t subscribe to that way of thinking and think its highly idiotic to tell a person that you wish you saw them more, if you don’t call, text, or e-mail them. But it gets better, if they said that once every 6 months or so I could careless but it happens EVERY time I see them, which is much more than once every 6 months.
Also, I am sick of people double booking their evenings and jumping from one event to the next. Why can’t you just pick one and genuinely enjoy being there? Perhaps we are just in very different places in life, which is ok, but I’d rather be cancelled on than have a pity visit.
I guess what it comes down to is I’m still sick of people being fake and social niceties.
Then I hate arriving somewhere and people waiting till just after I get there to take off, I’d rather be told not to go and not waste my time which is incredibly valuable to me.
I’m dizzy from this week and it doesn’t even feel like next week is spring break, I’m tired and maybe a week free from classes (but not homework) will improve my mood, but I am so tired of so called friends doing all of the above and in every sense of the word acting like the dumb characters from the book aforementioned.
Can’t I just be who I am instead of playing the social niceties game? Perhaps this is just Ryan rubbing off on me, but what a more exhilarating way to live, where I am who I am in all circles of life. This vent has been a long time coming.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
The Best and Worst Things of 2008
These are things I value finding, enjoying and being around in the last year
- Ryan
- My really awesome promotion at a much needed time
- Paying off the Laptop
- Realizing we will graduate in a YEAR!
- Mary getting married
- Jon getting married
- Trying Sushi for the first time ever and becoming an immediate fan
- Taking Childrens Lit, British Lit (emphasizing on Austen) and Adolescent Lit
- Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog
- The writer's strike, it was much needed and forced networks to give writers more on items they got paid less than 50 cents on...
- Wii Fit-you can all laugh at me, but its nice to have something that forces me to exercise correctly thats available all hours of the day
- Rayman Rabid Bunnies
- Trax
- Commuter Rail
- Scarves
- Skinny Jeans
- Short Hair
- The Book Thief
- StruwwelPeter
- Going to Wisconsin
- Cardmaking
- the Cricut
- The Cuttlebug
- Pushing Daisies
- Chuck
- Heroes
- The IT Crowd
- The Big Bang Theory (its a Saturnalia Miracle)
- How I Met Your Mother (I'm a Neil Patrick Harris fan)
- All the awesome festivals downtown
- The U being undefeated in Football, it takes bragging rights away from those who are poor losers
- Wall-E
- The Lecture by Ed Catmull, head of Pixar at the U
- Obama winning the election
- Gas under $2.00 a gallon again
- Akasaka Sushi
- Dolcetti Gelatto
- Trying Culver's for the first time and having to admit that the midwest has way way better dairy products than the west can ever hope for....
The Worst Things
- The end of Capitalism as we know it
- Huntsman cutting funding on snowplowing and thus making driving in the snow a very hazardous occurance
- Increasing the cost of tuition
- The crazy cold hand rash development
- The continuing popularity of Reality TV
- Breaking Dawn...I couldn't finish it because it was so badly written.
- Twilight (the movie) 30 seconds of an intro for a Collective Soul song that does absolutely nothing for the movie, it just felt sloppily put together
- The Economy, this includes and does not limit to people applying for mortgages and getting them too easily, people withdrawing money from stocks and going back to the mattress mentality and the stimulus checks that only delay the inevitable.
Thats my list for the year, and as the worst is only 8 items comparable to 38 of the best, I feel I have done the year justice.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Perfection-ism, Cataloging and my Disdain for it
Nothing in life is perfect. No one on the planet is perfect. People are not all the same, one should not ever be compared to another.
I was in an anthropology class once and the professor said something that stung me like a thorn, that people have to be judgmental, that it is something we have to do to survive and that the evolution of the world is based on it.
Maybe to a degree but not as intensely as people do.
Thus here I am, and I defy anyone to every want or tell me I am perfect, because that is perfectly ludicrous. Amidst the irony of putting up decorations with Ryan, I told him if this was anyone else it wouldn't be the same. My brain encourages all to think duh after that statement. But I love what I have, and I would not change one iota about it.
I love the crazy busy school/work life because this is the only time it will be exactly the way it is and I'm not ready to really be ahead of where I am now. Now is good. I'm flashing back to Pres Uchtdorf's talk at the Women's Conference, he said a lot of things that I needed to hear and was the right thing for most to hear.
He focused a lot on being Perfect and how that ruins our day to day lives. Women more than men actually compare themselves and its not always (I would say more often than not) a good thing.
I remember after that Conference talking to Ryan and saying, I never want to be perfect, and he kissed my head and told me he never wanted me to be. After all what is this perfect? I think I am perfect at being Angie, but I never want to be the perfect woman, mother, or wife, there is nothing about the idea that is healthy.
I love surprising people as they think they know just who and what I am and I do and the say "I never thought you were this type of person" or "I never thought you liked this"; truth be told I dare someone to categorize me as a type that fits, because the only one that fits is Angie Meeks, spaz extrordinaire. And why do I have to not do something if "I'm not the type". Well why not? and what in your life made you believe people have to be one way or the other? You want me to be less of who I am?
I like a lot of things about life, but my favorite thing is authenticity. Authentic food, friends, life, living, enjoyment, and my authentic Ryan. Others would need other things which is fine. but I hate with every fiber of my being people who do things because others want them too, people changing who they are around other people, it would both tire and annoy me keeping up with all of the facades, so here I am authentically me.
A lover of the fantastic and fantasy and sci-fi, rpg's, magic, holistic eastern thinking ( I HATE DR.S), other cultures and a little dabbling in card making(one day cricut thou wilt have thy own room, it shall be called a Craft Room), Sushi, music, writing, critiquing, living, loving and hating vampires without fangs, critiquing movies and plays and music as to wether it was worth the time spent, and not feeling invalidated by others who profess I don't seem the type, well then change the type, and I probably don't want to be it anyway.
Disdaining Perfectionism as the root downfall of all happy lives and the catologing that goes with it.
I was in an anthropology class once and the professor said something that stung me like a thorn, that people have to be judgmental, that it is something we have to do to survive and that the evolution of the world is based on it.
Maybe to a degree but not as intensely as people do.
Thus here I am, and I defy anyone to every want or tell me I am perfect, because that is perfectly ludicrous. Amidst the irony of putting up decorations with Ryan, I told him if this was anyone else it wouldn't be the same. My brain encourages all to think duh after that statement. But I love what I have, and I would not change one iota about it.
I love the crazy busy school/work life because this is the only time it will be exactly the way it is and I'm not ready to really be ahead of where I am now. Now is good. I'm flashing back to Pres Uchtdorf's talk at the Women's Conference, he said a lot of things that I needed to hear and was the right thing for most to hear.
He focused a lot on being Perfect and how that ruins our day to day lives. Women more than men actually compare themselves and its not always (I would say more often than not) a good thing.
I remember after that Conference talking to Ryan and saying, I never want to be perfect, and he kissed my head and told me he never wanted me to be. After all what is this perfect? I think I am perfect at being Angie, but I never want to be the perfect woman, mother, or wife, there is nothing about the idea that is healthy.
I love surprising people as they think they know just who and what I am and I do and the say "I never thought you were this type of person" or "I never thought you liked this"; truth be told I dare someone to categorize me as a type that fits, because the only one that fits is Angie Meeks, spaz extrordinaire. And why do I have to not do something if "I'm not the type". Well why not? and what in your life made you believe people have to be one way or the other? You want me to be less of who I am?
I like a lot of things about life, but my favorite thing is authenticity. Authentic food, friends, life, living, enjoyment, and my authentic Ryan. Others would need other things which is fine. but I hate with every fiber of my being people who do things because others want them too, people changing who they are around other people, it would both tire and annoy me keeping up with all of the facades, so here I am authentically me.
A lover of the fantastic and fantasy and sci-fi, rpg's, magic, holistic eastern thinking ( I HATE DR.S), other cultures and a little dabbling in card making(one day cricut thou wilt have thy own room, it shall be called a Craft Room), Sushi, music, writing, critiquing, living, loving and hating vampires without fangs, critiquing movies and plays and music as to wether it was worth the time spent, and not feeling invalidated by others who profess I don't seem the type, well then change the type, and I probably don't want to be it anyway.
Disdaining Perfectionism as the root downfall of all happy lives and the catologing that goes with it.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Concentration
Guess who has a paper due? I do, but I just have to outline, add quotes, fluff and then voila it’ll be done. Ok so that’s the whole paper, but its silly really, I am beyond the ability to focus, I have to nip all distractions in the bud but I just don’t have the motivation. It’s silly really, I’ve been doing school for years now, but fall semester is just harder.
I blame my beloved Thanksgiving, as visions of mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce dance through my head. And so it begins, the festivities that I love, but are distracting me from currently more life alternating responsibilities.
But in other news, I am utterly and completely content. My brain feels overstimulated and I predict all responsibility will shrink up in a corner after tonight, and thus making next week even more filled than this one….
Well my brain might turn off sooner than tonight, mayhaps its already been done, alas we go forth blindly ah yes, but I will over come this inability to concentrate, where is a can of orange juice when I need it…
I blame my beloved Thanksgiving, as visions of mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce dance through my head. And so it begins, the festivities that I love, but are distracting me from currently more life alternating responsibilities.
But in other news, I am utterly and completely content. My brain feels overstimulated and I predict all responsibility will shrink up in a corner after tonight, and thus making next week even more filled than this one….
Well my brain might turn off sooner than tonight, mayhaps its already been done, alas we go forth blindly ah yes, but I will over come this inability to concentrate, where is a can of orange juice when I need it…
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Bailout Blues
The automotive industry has received a bailout, now it is not just banks, but now companies receiving bailouts.
I am frustrated and I don't understand how a country already so in debt is able to use money it doesn't have to save companies. The system seems flawed and utterly in turmoil. I see the end to capitalism and the beginning of socialism, and I don't like it. The problem is, it can't stop now, we are in the midst of a cycle that cannot end happily, for the government is in debt and they are borrowing money from someone else. So who is this someone else and when are they going to come claim their justice?
Stimulus Checks don't work, and why? Because the people who would most profit from it do not get as much as everyone else. The system is flawed and I call for change.
"Remember Remember the 5th of November."
I am frustrated and I don't understand how a country already so in debt is able to use money it doesn't have to save companies. The system seems flawed and utterly in turmoil. I see the end to capitalism and the beginning of socialism, and I don't like it. The problem is, it can't stop now, we are in the midst of a cycle that cannot end happily, for the government is in debt and they are borrowing money from someone else. So who is this someone else and when are they going to come claim their justice?
Stimulus Checks don't work, and why? Because the people who would most profit from it do not get as much as everyone else. The system is flawed and I call for change.
"Remember Remember the 5th of November."
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Random Skin Antics
So for the past little while my skin has been freaking me out. It started one lovely Wednesday night while we went out to eat with some close friends. After dinner we walked around Trolley Square for a bit but I began to feel very uncomfortable in the skin I am in, I looked at my hands and my knees and feet and my skin was both swollen and hot but itching like mad and red blotches began to appear.
We quickly went home and I took a quick bath thinking it was something on my clothes, and changed to a different outfit. The next day at work my hands were itching something awful and my hands were ugly swollen balloons. I put lotion on thinking it was from the drastic change in weather.
We attempted dancing, Ryan had to hold my wrists and the dancing was nothing less than ungraceful.
A whole week went by with this discomfort until I finally caved and called the doctor. At first I called the Dermatology unit, the soonest date they had available wasn’t until December and if I drove a half hour then possibly November. Keep in mind this was a week and a half before Halloween. So I called my family doctor and went to show them my bizarre alien skin, of course knowing doctors and my lovely situation with them and how absolutely bizarre my medical issues are, they told me close to nothing but prescribed an allergy medicine and gave me a stronger cream to use on it. It is now November 13 and though the allergy medicine is making everything bearable, my strong tendency to not taking medicine unless I absolutely have to snuck in.
Within 3 hours of being off the medicine, the red spots appeared all over and began to burn me.
So consensus, I have some awful allergic reaction. To what? Who knows I’m still trying to keep my skin unexposed to the air, and that seemed to help as well, but I’d like a real diagnosis and not just something to cure the symptoms. I’d like to circumvent the whole thing altogether. Does anyone have any ideas?
We quickly went home and I took a quick bath thinking it was something on my clothes, and changed to a different outfit. The next day at work my hands were itching something awful and my hands were ugly swollen balloons. I put lotion on thinking it was from the drastic change in weather.
We attempted dancing, Ryan had to hold my wrists and the dancing was nothing less than ungraceful.
A whole week went by with this discomfort until I finally caved and called the doctor. At first I called the Dermatology unit, the soonest date they had available wasn’t until December and if I drove a half hour then possibly November. Keep in mind this was a week and a half before Halloween. So I called my family doctor and went to show them my bizarre alien skin, of course knowing doctors and my lovely situation with them and how absolutely bizarre my medical issues are, they told me close to nothing but prescribed an allergy medicine and gave me a stronger cream to use on it. It is now November 13 and though the allergy medicine is making everything bearable, my strong tendency to not taking medicine unless I absolutely have to snuck in.
Within 3 hours of being off the medicine, the red spots appeared all over and began to burn me.
So consensus, I have some awful allergic reaction. To what? Who knows I’m still trying to keep my skin unexposed to the air, and that seemed to help as well, but I’d like a real diagnosis and not just something to cure the symptoms. I’d like to circumvent the whole thing altogether. Does anyone have any ideas?
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
A Few Things
I am a bona fide Libertarian and all people who react calling all Libertarians crazy, well here I am.
They use examples of people who are running on the Libertarian ballot that they claim to be nut cases, but I think all parties have rotten nuts among them, and it should not stop a person from researching a party out.
But to all those who see the world as black and white donkey and elephant why not change that view. There is so much out there available to us other than Republican and Democrat, but if it fits what you think the world should be then great for you. I am speaking out to people who pick from both sides, moderates, and why can't their be a mainstream media known 3rd party, why should the country demand a person choose between a ham sandwich or a cheese sandwich, why cannot the sandwich be put together and become a ham and cheese sandwich, delicious delectable mesh of the flavors complimenting the other as the original could not.
So hoping, nay demanding another choice is our god given right, mine which I defend and all people calling that crazy to you I say good day and enjoy your bland sandwich. Viva La Flavor!
They use examples of people who are running on the Libertarian ballot that they claim to be nut cases, but I think all parties have rotten nuts among them, and it should not stop a person from researching a party out.
But to all those who see the world as black and white donkey and elephant why not change that view. There is so much out there available to us other than Republican and Democrat, but if it fits what you think the world should be then great for you. I am speaking out to people who pick from both sides, moderates, and why can't their be a mainstream media known 3rd party, why should the country demand a person choose between a ham sandwich or a cheese sandwich, why cannot the sandwich be put together and become a ham and cheese sandwich, delicious delectable mesh of the flavors complimenting the other as the original could not.
So hoping, nay demanding another choice is our god given right, mine which I defend and all people calling that crazy to you I say good day and enjoy your bland sandwich. Viva La Flavor!
Friday, October 17, 2008
News
I don't know why Ryan insists on watching the news, I just can't watch anymore.
There are too many things going on that rile me up and make me unbearable with my many soapboxes for days on end.
And then there is the inevitable "I told you so" thats been on the tip of my tongue for years, and its getting harder and harder to not scream at this point.
I'm just wondering why people are so greedy and why we all have to suffer because of it.
Why doesn't anyone trust candidates and why do they all have to be so greasy and slimy.
Why can't that change?
There are too many things going on that rile me up and make me unbearable with my many soapboxes for days on end.
And then there is the inevitable "I told you so" thats been on the tip of my tongue for years, and its getting harder and harder to not scream at this point.
I'm just wondering why people are so greedy and why we all have to suffer because of it.
Why doesn't anyone trust candidates and why do they all have to be so greasy and slimy.
Why can't that change?
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
The Death of Capitalism
Last Nights Debate
Its really hard to decide where to begin, as there is so much ridiculousness about it. They shouldn’t call them debates they should call them slams. And both sides are just as at fault, with McCain’s responses littered with Cronies, and Obama’s with lobbyists. This was bothersome because its alienating. Its hard enough to decide what with policies changing so much but with the added mudslinging and the fangs being bared. How is it adult or mature at all?
I have to say this, I understand what the proposed policies are and how they should work, but the thing is nothing works out as planned. If McCain gives a trillion dollars to companies and people with mortgages, what have we learned? Absolutely nothing! Why don’t we just erase our debt and start over? It’s the same concept and it does not work for the same reasons that this one won’t. If you rescue someone they tend to not be smart about what they ought to do, typically they frivolously spend without saving and not bettering their situation, but merely sinking right back into it.
The problem is the whole country is drunk on spending money and now consumers don’t trust it and so they are going back to the “putting money in the mattress” idea.
My solution is rather simple, a bailout of types, but one with regulation and trust on both sides. Give the money that would be for bailing out companies to their stock holders in a form that cannot be withdrawn for 5-10 years. Announce the solution and give a deadline for people to buy stocks, that way everyone would have a fair chance. Its nipping the first part of the problem where it started.
Too bad politicians are so slimy, they’d have come to a better solution ages ago, but it wouldn’t benefit them, their friends or their lobbyists.
I think I’m witnessing the death of capitalism.
Its really hard to decide where to begin, as there is so much ridiculousness about it. They shouldn’t call them debates they should call them slams. And both sides are just as at fault, with McCain’s responses littered with Cronies, and Obama’s with lobbyists. This was bothersome because its alienating. Its hard enough to decide what with policies changing so much but with the added mudslinging and the fangs being bared. How is it adult or mature at all?
I have to say this, I understand what the proposed policies are and how they should work, but the thing is nothing works out as planned. If McCain gives a trillion dollars to companies and people with mortgages, what have we learned? Absolutely nothing! Why don’t we just erase our debt and start over? It’s the same concept and it does not work for the same reasons that this one won’t. If you rescue someone they tend to not be smart about what they ought to do, typically they frivolously spend without saving and not bettering their situation, but merely sinking right back into it.
The problem is the whole country is drunk on spending money and now consumers don’t trust it and so they are going back to the “putting money in the mattress” idea.
My solution is rather simple, a bailout of types, but one with regulation and trust on both sides. Give the money that would be for bailing out companies to their stock holders in a form that cannot be withdrawn for 5-10 years. Announce the solution and give a deadline for people to buy stocks, that way everyone would have a fair chance. Its nipping the first part of the problem where it started.
Too bad politicians are so slimy, they’d have come to a better solution ages ago, but it wouldn’t benefit them, their friends or their lobbyists.
I think I’m witnessing the death of capitalism.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Making Sense of a Nonsensical Time
This makes sense to me, because flash back to the stimulus check, done via tax bracket. Its never made sense, and it never will make sense to pay people more government funding if they make more. This makes way too much common sense, so they must circumvent, reword and reward negligent friends who are in the higher bracket.
The article best explaining in layman’s turn what is going on is:
http://tpmcafe.talkingpointsmemo.com/2008/09/29/why_bail/
I was linked to it from my friend Natalie’s blog. Here are some highlights I liked best.
By Dean Baker
“At this point I cannot identify a single good reason to do the bailout.
The basic argument for the bailout is that the banks are filled with so much bad debt that the banks can't trust each other to repay loans. This creates a situation in which the system of payments breaks down. That would mean that we cannot use our ATMs or credit cards or cash checks.
That is a very frightening scenario, but this is not where things end. The Federal Reserve Board would surely step in and take over the major money center banks so that the system of payments would begin functioning again. The Fed was prepared to take over the major banks back in the 80s when bad debt to developing countries threatened to make them insolvent. It is inconceivable that it has not made similar preparations in the current crisis.
In other words, the worst case scenario is that we have an extremely scary day in which the markets freeze for a few hours. Then the Fed steps in and takes over the major banks. The system of payments continues to operate exactly as before, but the bank executives are out of their jobs and the bank shareholders have likely lost most of their money. In other words, the banks have a gun pointed to their heads and are threatening to pull the trigger unless we hand them $700 billion.
If we are not worried about this worst case scenario (to be clear, I wouldn't want to see it), then why should we do the bailout?
There has been a mountain of scare stories and misinformation circulated to push the bailout. Yes, banks have tightened credit. Yes, we are in a recession. But the problem is not a freeze up of the banking system. The problem is the collapse of an $8 trillion housing bubble. (It was remarkable how many so-called experts somehow could not see the housing bubble as it grew to ever more dangerous levels. It is even more remarkable that many of these experts still don't recognize the bubble even as its collapse sinks the economy and the financial system.) The decline in housing prices to date has already cost the economy $4 trillion to $5 trillion in housing equity. This would be expected to lead to a decline in annual consumption on the order of $160 billion to $300 billion.
Given the loss of housing equity, I have actually been surprised that the downturn has not been sharper. Homeowners had been consuming based on their home equity. Much of that equity has now disappeared with the collapse of the bubble. We would expect that their consumption would fall. We also would expect that banks would be reluctant to lend to people who no longer have any collateral.
This is the story of the downturn and of course the bailout does almost nothing to counter this drop in demand. At best, it will make capital available to some marginal lenders who would not otherwise receive loans. We should demand more for $700 billion.
For the record, the restrictions on executive pay and the commitment to give the taxpayers equity in banks in exchange for buying bad assets are jokes. These provisions are sops to provide cover. They are not written in ways to be binding. (And Congress knows how to write binding rules.)
Finally, the bailout absolutely can make things worse. We are going to be in a serious recession because of the collapse of the housing bubble. We will need effective stimulus measures to boost the economy and keep the recession from getting worse.
However, the $700 billion outlay on the bailout is likely to be used as an argument against effective stimulus. We have already seen voices like the Washington Post and the Wall Street funded Peterson Foundation arguing that the government will have to make serious cutbacks because of the bailout.
While their argument is wrong, these are powerful voices in national debates. If the bailout proves to be an obstacle to effective stimulus in future months and years, then the bailout could lead to exactly the sort of prolonged economic downturn that its proponents claim it is intended to prevent.
In short, the bailout rewards some of the richest people in the country for their incompetence. It provides little obvious economic benefit and could lead to long-term harm. That looks like a pretty bad deal.”
So in reality the bailout only rewards people who are spending more than the average person. Probably the same people who haven’t dropped prices in food. So looking at the Presidential tickets, some things the layman should know.
McCain/Palin-will likely be a continuing of the Bush regime. Rewarding friends with tax breaks and so forth, just like most all other Republicans minus Ron Paul.
Obama/Biden-since he isn’t backed by huge corporate businesses, it’s a lot more likely he won’t reward them with tax breaks.
Who would you choose? Who would reward the more middle class Americans?
Also, for people who market and use the internet for business, McCain wants to charge you a type of electronic property fee. While I have to admit the market is there, why should people have to pay for their online advertising, aside from what they probably already pay.
Last Spring when the markets were teetering it seemed worse for the gov to step in and save companies. What happened to capitalism? And the only way capitalism works is if the government isn’t attached. The more banks going under now is the banks own fault. But no one is worried about their neglectful actions because if its bad enough and they think they affect the economy so heavily, they now the government will come in and save them.
The article best explaining in layman’s turn what is going on is:
http://tpmcafe.talkingpointsmemo.com/2008/09/29/why_bail/
I was linked to it from my friend Natalie’s blog. Here are some highlights I liked best.
By Dean Baker
“At this point I cannot identify a single good reason to do the bailout.
The basic argument for the bailout is that the banks are filled with so much bad debt that the banks can't trust each other to repay loans. This creates a situation in which the system of payments breaks down. That would mean that we cannot use our ATMs or credit cards or cash checks.
That is a very frightening scenario, but this is not where things end. The Federal Reserve Board would surely step in and take over the major money center banks so that the system of payments would begin functioning again. The Fed was prepared to take over the major banks back in the 80s when bad debt to developing countries threatened to make them insolvent. It is inconceivable that it has not made similar preparations in the current crisis.
In other words, the worst case scenario is that we have an extremely scary day in which the markets freeze for a few hours. Then the Fed steps in and takes over the major banks. The system of payments continues to operate exactly as before, but the bank executives are out of their jobs and the bank shareholders have likely lost most of their money. In other words, the banks have a gun pointed to their heads and are threatening to pull the trigger unless we hand them $700 billion.
If we are not worried about this worst case scenario (to be clear, I wouldn't want to see it), then why should we do the bailout?
There has been a mountain of scare stories and misinformation circulated to push the bailout. Yes, banks have tightened credit. Yes, we are in a recession. But the problem is not a freeze up of the banking system. The problem is the collapse of an $8 trillion housing bubble. (It was remarkable how many so-called experts somehow could not see the housing bubble as it grew to ever more dangerous levels. It is even more remarkable that many of these experts still don't recognize the bubble even as its collapse sinks the economy and the financial system.) The decline in housing prices to date has already cost the economy $4 trillion to $5 trillion in housing equity. This would be expected to lead to a decline in annual consumption on the order of $160 billion to $300 billion.
Given the loss of housing equity, I have actually been surprised that the downturn has not been sharper. Homeowners had been consuming based on their home equity. Much of that equity has now disappeared with the collapse of the bubble. We would expect that their consumption would fall. We also would expect that banks would be reluctant to lend to people who no longer have any collateral.
This is the story of the downturn and of course the bailout does almost nothing to counter this drop in demand. At best, it will make capital available to some marginal lenders who would not otherwise receive loans. We should demand more for $700 billion.
For the record, the restrictions on executive pay and the commitment to give the taxpayers equity in banks in exchange for buying bad assets are jokes. These provisions are sops to provide cover. They are not written in ways to be binding. (And Congress knows how to write binding rules.)
Finally, the bailout absolutely can make things worse. We are going to be in a serious recession because of the collapse of the housing bubble. We will need effective stimulus measures to boost the economy and keep the recession from getting worse.
However, the $700 billion outlay on the bailout is likely to be used as an argument against effective stimulus. We have already seen voices like the Washington Post and the Wall Street funded Peterson Foundation arguing that the government will have to make serious cutbacks because of the bailout.
While their argument is wrong, these are powerful voices in national debates. If the bailout proves to be an obstacle to effective stimulus in future months and years, then the bailout could lead to exactly the sort of prolonged economic downturn that its proponents claim it is intended to prevent.
In short, the bailout rewards some of the richest people in the country for their incompetence. It provides little obvious economic benefit and could lead to long-term harm. That looks like a pretty bad deal.”
So in reality the bailout only rewards people who are spending more than the average person. Probably the same people who haven’t dropped prices in food. So looking at the Presidential tickets, some things the layman should know.
McCain/Palin-will likely be a continuing of the Bush regime. Rewarding friends with tax breaks and so forth, just like most all other Republicans minus Ron Paul.
Obama/Biden-since he isn’t backed by huge corporate businesses, it’s a lot more likely he won’t reward them with tax breaks.
Who would you choose? Who would reward the more middle class Americans?
Also, for people who market and use the internet for business, McCain wants to charge you a type of electronic property fee. While I have to admit the market is there, why should people have to pay for their online advertising, aside from what they probably already pay.
Last Spring when the markets were teetering it seemed worse for the gov to step in and save companies. What happened to capitalism? And the only way capitalism works is if the government isn’t attached. The more banks going under now is the banks own fault. But no one is worried about their neglectful actions because if its bad enough and they think they affect the economy so heavily, they now the government will come in and save them.
Friday, September 26, 2008
America the Beautiful?
I am an Unreliable Narrator, I realize that, I’m impulsive and quick to the point, but have benefited very much from my “initiative”.
This being said, look at the country, its crumbling under our feet, the economy is a joke and if this only affected the US I wouldn’t care, but its nation wide. The US has put the world in a very scary position. This era of running around without checks and balances, removing regulations is taking its toll. And I for one am not going to sit quietly while people lie to my face and tell me everything is going to be ok.
This is scary.
So who is responsible? The greedy people who removed the regulations and lined their friends pockets with money. I am a moderate, and I don’t really feel I should have to have a tie to a country that has so abused my rights. What rights you say? Property.
Property has been a long promise for those in the middle class and that dream was ripped away when people started walking away from loans and mortgages. But why would banks give loans to people who before now wouldn’t have been approved, the removal of regulation and now the demand for it as there are consistent bail outs, but who is benefiting? I see my stocks shrinking, so it must be those greedy bigots at the top, the ones who used loans that should have benefited first time home buyers on 3rd and 4th houses.
You think this is radical? Well open your eyes, if you aren’t appalled you aren’t paying attention. It seems like no one is. Look at the condition of the world, it seems people who should be paying really close attention have done nothing, and who is going to suffer? We are.
A few summers ago an amazing TV show aired, which I watched online, why pollute my mind with more advertising? The show was amazing, it touched on the dystopian feel of America, and how so many do not feel a strong patriotic feel. I am one of them. I see America as destroying culture, the strong influence we have over the development of todays time is awful. What happened to the beauty each culture had before? Why swirl it into one? Helped them? Brought them technology? Hardly, England merely exploited and how can anyone say we do any different? There is a reason that people in India run from people trying to give them polio immunizations, because before they were sterilized.
Leave the country you say? Gladly, but the irreparable damage is done, and the whole world is suffering. But aren’t we innovative you say? Hardly, our country outlawed scientific developments for RELIGIOUS REASONS. That’s nearly as awful as burning down the Great Library but instead outlawing the knowledge within. So how can I speak out?
I am a traveler, I refuse to be an American. Not with its cookie cutter neighborhoods, excessive consuming, and paltry fast food restaurants.
So I am Angie a traveler.
This being said, look at the country, its crumbling under our feet, the economy is a joke and if this only affected the US I wouldn’t care, but its nation wide. The US has put the world in a very scary position. This era of running around without checks and balances, removing regulations is taking its toll. And I for one am not going to sit quietly while people lie to my face and tell me everything is going to be ok.
This is scary.
So who is responsible? The greedy people who removed the regulations and lined their friends pockets with money. I am a moderate, and I don’t really feel I should have to have a tie to a country that has so abused my rights. What rights you say? Property.
Property has been a long promise for those in the middle class and that dream was ripped away when people started walking away from loans and mortgages. But why would banks give loans to people who before now wouldn’t have been approved, the removal of regulation and now the demand for it as there are consistent bail outs, but who is benefiting? I see my stocks shrinking, so it must be those greedy bigots at the top, the ones who used loans that should have benefited first time home buyers on 3rd and 4th houses.
You think this is radical? Well open your eyes, if you aren’t appalled you aren’t paying attention. It seems like no one is. Look at the condition of the world, it seems people who should be paying really close attention have done nothing, and who is going to suffer? We are.
A few summers ago an amazing TV show aired, which I watched online, why pollute my mind with more advertising? The show was amazing, it touched on the dystopian feel of America, and how so many do not feel a strong patriotic feel. I am one of them. I see America as destroying culture, the strong influence we have over the development of todays time is awful. What happened to the beauty each culture had before? Why swirl it into one? Helped them? Brought them technology? Hardly, England merely exploited and how can anyone say we do any different? There is a reason that people in India run from people trying to give them polio immunizations, because before they were sterilized.
Leave the country you say? Gladly, but the irreparable damage is done, and the whole world is suffering. But aren’t we innovative you say? Hardly, our country outlawed scientific developments for RELIGIOUS REASONS. That’s nearly as awful as burning down the Great Library but instead outlawing the knowledge within. So how can I speak out?
I am a traveler, I refuse to be an American. Not with its cookie cutter neighborhoods, excessive consuming, and paltry fast food restaurants.
So I am Angie a traveler.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Snack or Feast?
I have read Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer, and I’m not impressed by it at all. Its like my pickiness with watching movies, they should do something for me, otherwise why should I waste my time watching? Time is something I value, I don’t have enough of it. I’m always in a hurry, busy, and I welcome days where nothing is planned. Even getting sick is a blessing, as it forces both Ryan and I to slow down.
Back to the book, its candy, its like chocolate, easy to consume but not nourishing, lest its dark chocolate, but the whole series has been gross waxy chocolate. Even worse is that people are raving about it, this very very unhealthy book series. However, I feel that with Breaking Dawn, there was too much and people finally took a stand against the impracticality and the difference between that and real life.
Good writers don’t let you question between what is reality and what is the book’s reality. They tell you what is real, and when you finish the book, you ache for that other reality, or location, you feel its departure and ending acutely. This is not the case with mediocre writing.
Astounding difference, “The Book Thief” written some few years ago has a more poignant story and makes you miss the world and story. Perhaps I have been spoiled, I’m fairly certain I have had the good fortune to get my hands on stories and books that have enriched my being.
Now let us compare, what would you rather have, a beautifully delicious feast or a simple Hershey’s bar? I felt like “Breaking Dawn” was a simple American waxy chocolate bar. Where is the quality in that?
Now to go find myself a feast.
Back to the book, its candy, its like chocolate, easy to consume but not nourishing, lest its dark chocolate, but the whole series has been gross waxy chocolate. Even worse is that people are raving about it, this very very unhealthy book series. However, I feel that with Breaking Dawn, there was too much and people finally took a stand against the impracticality and the difference between that and real life.
Good writers don’t let you question between what is reality and what is the book’s reality. They tell you what is real, and when you finish the book, you ache for that other reality, or location, you feel its departure and ending acutely. This is not the case with mediocre writing.
Astounding difference, “The Book Thief” written some few years ago has a more poignant story and makes you miss the world and story. Perhaps I have been spoiled, I’m fairly certain I have had the good fortune to get my hands on stories and books that have enriched my being.
Now let us compare, what would you rather have, a beautifully delicious feast or a simple Hershey’s bar? I felt like “Breaking Dawn” was a simple American waxy chocolate bar. Where is the quality in that?
Now to go find myself a feast.
Opposite Day
My brain is literally a mess of things right now. This is my feeble attempt to sort some issues out. I really am quite unfocused right now. This is so awkwardly different from Saturday, when I woke up and started writing, same for Sunday, but I guess weekend life is radically different from the work week. I dream of a day when it’s the opposite, when my job besides taking care of children will be writing.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Repression and the Obvious Consequential Result
I’m reading “The Catcher in the Rye”, a book I recalled from a Newsradio episode where the characters were all discussing how their parents wouldn’t let them read it; one mother burned down her house to stop her child from reading it. This encouraged me to read the novel, however 5-6 years later I have finally begun to read it.
The 50’s kind of appall me. I just don’t understand how revolutionary ideas would be so tamed by the end of war. Logically the end of war is two steps forward, not two steps back. And a book like “The Catcher in the Rye” published in 1951, should not have been so disconcerting. The book deals with a lot of swearing, but as compared to what is published nowadays, it is exceedingly tame.
The novel deals with growing up, dealing with teenage angst with a character that is relatable for all, someone dealing with depression as a result of post traumatic stress.
Why should mental illness have been so taboo? Why was there such an awful social stigma associated with being psycho analyzed, and why has it caused such a commotion.
However, I think the 1950’s taught us a very important lesson. If you do not deal with an issue, it does not go away, it merely festers. Something to keep in mind with current issues, ignoring them and brushing them under the rug makes the situation worse.
Logically the 50’s repression leads to the 60’s wildness, and the 50’s conservativeness leads to the 60’s liberalness. But that’s a good thing and society has a way of correcting itself from decade to decade, lets see what the 2010’s have in store for us.
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